NEWS FROM A MAN WITH A SMALL PENIS: SWEET CORN IS BETTER THAN SEX

I was searching the web for interesting news to share with you and found this on CNN. It’s always weird to hear man say that food is better than sex. That is just an expression that guys are never suuposed to say. It doesn’t take much for a man to have an orgasm, just a little friction and….BOOOM!!! So, for a man to say that food is better than sex, they must not be able to feel any friction. This can only mean one thing…..SMALL PENIS!!!

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Like Garrison Keillor said, “Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn.”

Sweet corn evokes memories of my summers on the East Coast with my grandfather and the wonderful meals that my grandmother would make with the corn that my grandfather and I had picked, shucked and cooked.

When corn season comes around, it is always an exciting time in the restaurant. We focus on a few key things when we are cooking with corn: the best quality product, a fresh product, minimal cooking time so as to not lose the fresh sweet flavor, proper technique, and making sure to remember it’s a fun, down-and-dirty experience to eat it. First and foremost, it is important to start with a great ear of corn. Never buy corn that is refrigerated! That means you should check the quality at the market or store*. Peel back the top outer layers and silk of the cob to make sure it has even rows and no signs of bugs. You can even take a kernel off and taste it to see if it’s sweet.

My grandfather taught me when I was young the importance of freshness with corn. First, he would put a huge pot of salted water on the stove and turn the gas on high. We would then get in his car and drive the half mile to my great uncle’s to pick 12-18 ears of corn. On the drive back, I had to clean the ears in the car into a paper bag. Once we got home, my grandmother would have all of dinner ready – except for the corn.

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THIS IS JUST NASTY!!! BURGER KING ADDS BACON SUNDAE TO GIVE YOU A HEART ATTACK THIS SUMMER!

Burger King wants to lure customers this summer with a barbecue party — and a bacon sundae.

Burger King on Thursday is launching several pork, beef and chicken sandwiches as limited time offers. And for a sweet ending, the company is also offering a bacon sundae — vanilla soft serve with fudge, caramel, bacon crumbles and a piece of bacon — that started in Nashville, Tenn. earlier this year.

The salty-sweet dessert clocks in at 510 calories, 18 grams of fat and 61 grams of sugar. Most people do not burn this many calories during a workout!

The limited-time items are Burger King’s latest push to win back customers with a revived menu and reverse sliding market share, an effort that started soon after the company was taken private by the private equity firm 3G Capital in late 2010.

Earlier this year, Burger King launched its biggest-ever menu expansion including fruit smoothies, snack wraps and new salads. The items were intended to go after a broader audience of moms and families, a shift from the chain’s previous strategy of courting young men with calorie bombs.

Core menu items, such as French fries and the Whopper, have also been tweaked as part of the company’s efforts to improve food quality. Burger King is trying to underscore its own focus on ingredients with a new tag line, “Taste Is King,” which replaces “Have It Your Way.” A new ad has been celebrating summer barbecues to highlight the chain’s emphasis on fire-grilling burgers. The new summer items will be featured in ads starting Thursday.

This month, 3G plans to take Burger King public on the New York Stock Exchange.

Wendy’s is also revamping its menu to improve ingredients and recast itself as a higher-end burger chain. The makeovers by the hamburger giants come at a time when the traditional fast-food chains are seeing more competition from smaller players such as Five Guys Burgers and Smashburger that offer higher-quality food and alternatives such as Subway.

Burger King isn’t the only fast-food chain that’s trying to draw attention with unusual offerings. Taco Bell earlier this year introduced its tacos with Doritos shells and a “nacho burrito” that includes corn chips.

The rest of Burger King’s summer menu includes:

—Memphis Pulled Pork BBQ Sandwich.

—Carolina BBQ Whopper or Chicken Sandwich.

—Texas BBQ Whopper or Chicken Sandwich.

—Sweet potato fries.

—Frozen Lemonade.

The items will be available through the summer or while supplies last.

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NICKI MINAJ AND FUNKMASTER FLEX FIGHT OVER SUMMER JAM FIASCO

Summer Jam 2012 has come and gone, but the drama surrounding Nicki Minaj and YMCMB’s canceled performance at the annual concert is still the talk of the town. On Monday night (June 4) Minaj decided to put an end to the hearsay by calling into Funkmaster Flex’s show on New York City’s Hot 97 radio station, where they hashed out their beef publicly. Would it have been too much to ask for some input from the actual offender, Peter Rosenberg?

During their heated discussion, which opened with Flex admitting that they’d already been arguing for an hour, Nicki Minaj was adamant in insisting that Rosenberg chose the wrong time and place to voice his negative opinions. “It’s not about his opinion, because I have opinions about DJs on Hot 97 and I have opinions on Hot 97,” she said. “But when it’s about us uniting people [for] your show, I wouldn’t dare come on your stage and say something negative about Hot 97, leading up to that concert.”

“My fans at Summer Jam didn’t appreciate his comments, nor did my fans who were watching the livestream appreciate his comments,” she added. “This is streaming to the world. Nicki Minaj opened up that stream to show to kids in London and Paris, it was hosted on my website and those requests came from your station, I posted the links.”

Flex countered that Nicki was overreacting when she listened to Lil Wayne and pulled out of the show and he accused her of riling up fans on Twitter before dealing with the issue internally, but she wasn’t having any of it, maintaining that what Weezy says goes.

“I don’t go against the president of my label. Before I had New York radio, I had Wayne,” she said, emphatically. “I will never go against Wayne. I can’t believe after all these years he’s still teaching me. After a man goes on stage and disrespects me and tries to rile people up, I still was going on that stage and shame on me. Lil Wayne gave me a valuable lesson in self worth. He tweeted before he called me, and when I spoke to him he said, ‘Nick, we ain’t doing that show.”

Minaj explained that the attack felt extra vindictive since she was the only woman on the roster (note: but not because she was the only woman on the roster), and plenty of yelling and screaming ensued (usually punctuated by Minaj repeating Flex’s name slowly, in an effort to calm him down).

One final issue that she needed to address was Flex’s earlier rant, in which he made questionable remarks about her music sales. “When you give stats to the world, people listen to you, and it’s important that people know Nicki Minaj is actually out here selling records, singles and making money for Universal,” she said, rattling off the sales she’s banked with Pink Friday and Pink Friday: Roman Reloaded, topping it off with my favorite line, “I Get Money.”

It’d be a lie to say that things ended on a completely rosy note, but it seems like Minaj might’ve had the upper hand here. Flex admitted that Rosenberg could’ve picked a better time to criticize Minaj and she still stuck by Wayne’s decision to pull her out of the show. (“This is my hometown, I wanted to come on stage for my fans, my barbz, my babies.”)

When Flex made one last joking attempt to get an apology out of her, you can probably guess the tone of her response: “Excuse Me?” No radio station that allowed someone to disrespect me is getting an apology.”

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DONNA SUMMER DISCO DIVA DEAD AT 63

Legendary disco diva Donna Summer has died, a spokesman confirmed to  TheWrap.

The “Hot Stuff” and “Last Dance” singer was 63.

No cause of death was given, but TMZ reports Summer had been battling  cancer.

In a statement, Summer’s family praise the singer’s religious faith.

“While we grieve her passing, we are at peace celebrating her extraordinary  life and her continued legacy,” the statement reads. “Words truly can’t express  how much we appreciate your prayers and love for our family at this sensitive  time.”

Bing: Listen to Donna Summer’s biggest hits

Summer’s soaring mezzo-soprano voice and catchy lyrics provided the  soundtrack to the 1970s, making it nearly impossible to think of many of that  decade’s cultural touchstones, be they bellbottoms or disco balls, without  calling to mind her hit singles.

Among the hits that helped cement Summer’s legacy were “She Works Hard for  the Money,” “Bad Girls” and “Dim All the Lights.” She would earn five  Grammy awards and 17 nominations over the course of her career.

In a 2003 interview with The New York Times, Summer said she felt that  her propulsive, candy-coated dance numbers captured the national zeitgeist of  the 1970s and helped people turn the page on the chaotic social upheaval of the  previous decade.

“In that period people were in a dance mood,” Summer said. “They wanted to be  lifted up, they wanted to have fun, they didn’t want to think.”

Photos: In Memoriam: Donna Summer

”You were coming out of the Vietnam war, the 60′s , the protest era, and I  was coming out of it as well,” she added. ”I think people were just in a  different mindset. When dance music came out, with that beat and that movement,  it was a switch.”

Yet while Summer may have downplayed her political significance, one group  who embraced her music was the gay community. Emboldened by the Stonewall Riots,  Summer’s anthems of empowerment struck a chord with a group that was  beginning to agitate for greater political rights and freedoms.

That relationship endured throughout her career, but it did undergo  significant strain after reports surfaced that Summer made anti-gay remarks  about AIDS victims in the mid-1980s and called the disease divine  retribution.

She claimed that she never made the statements and would later sue New York  magazine in 1991 for libel when it reprinted the allegations.

In a 1989 letter to an AIDS activist group, Summer wrote, “I was unknowingly  protected by those around me from the bad press and hate letters. … If I have  caused you pain, forgive me.”

Though Summer and disco were nearly interchangeable, she proved herself to be  a musical chameleon, one who survived the end of the Studio 54 era and continued  to produce chart-topping songs into the 1980s and beyond.

Over the ensuing three decades, Summer branched into new genres, such as new  wave, with her 1980 album “The Wanderer”; swing on her poorly received 1991  album “Mistaken Identity”; and gospel with her 1994 holiday album “Christmas  Spirit.”

The singer is survived by her husband, singer and producer Bruce Sudano;  their daughters, Brooklyn and Amanda; and Summer’s daughter, Mimi, from a  previous marriage.